I’ve posted here a lot about my mental health, I lost basically everything, I have no one I can talk to, my car is wrecked, I have less than 100 bucks in my bank account, while I have housing their are problems that make it not the best. I have 1k in debt.
In terms of my housing, I lived with some members a activist group for a bit, but they got too extreme the the point where they think me wanting to pay of my debt, save up for a car is individualist and me wanting to go college is carrierist.
Another thing is I’m an unattractive trans fem, que transphobia, I know y’all are gonna laugh like hell when I blow my brains out, some of y’all might be like THIS IS THE Consequences OF GENDER IDEOLOGY.
I just really don’t see a way forward at all, I felt like there isn’t much for me in this world anymore. Everytime I call a suicide hotline I get the dumbest most braindead advice like do an activity I enjoy as if that changes any of the material conditions of my life.
My plan is to have a dead switch, so when I do die 911 is called to help avoid any unnecessary trauma. It’s crazy to think 22 years ends like this.
Life is very short and you will die soon anyway. Hang around and see what happens and try to not take things so seriously. Find the humor in things even though it’s fucked up. Find the beauty in the banal even though it’s boring. It gets easier as you mature.
100 percent this helped me.
Helped me find a sense of humor that I want to try bringing to others at open mics. 16 years after beating depression, it’s worth it.
If you’re going to do something extreme, do it with a tinge of positivity. Change your life while helping others. Volunteer. You will be helping yourself in the process, I promise